Thursday, March 15, 2007

You know I love you so

Everyone knows I'm a lonely guy. I try not to think about it too much, but I know that's not really the whole truth. I'm just able to keep those demons at bay, and it's important that I do so. The more I try to not be lonely by doing everything I can, the more I fuck up by trying too hard.

I talked about Matt, the swim guy, earlier on. He's one of only two "friends" outside of work I have now. I put that in quotes because we're not really friends yet, you know. Just swim buddies. But I know it's not likely we're gonna be much more than that, even though that's fine by itself. I find myself screwing up sometimes because inside of me I get those emotions and I don't carry it off very well anymore. Why don't I just chill and everything would be better?

You know, last night, I wrote on my myspace, under who I'd like to meet, that I wanted to meet all the good, cool people in this world. I only want to meet them because I'm happy doing that. So I shouldn't think so hard about wanting much more. That's my weakness. Thinking too hard about some shit ideal.

We talked about doing kick and pull sets, so I'm thinking I'll get a pair of fins and paddles and a pull buoy. It'd be cool!

I think I need to write down my goals once again to keep me level-headed. Watch out, folks! Next entry. Off to bed now.


Blogger Sue said...

I use fins to kick with and I just love them. They set your legs in perfect form for kicking and really give all of your muscle groups a more thorough work out. Be sure to try to kick on your sides, and back as well to alter the muscle groups you are using. You are going to love your workouts with fins.

7:35 PM  

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